Father dearest

ShitMyDadSays

‎"He's nice now but he WAS an asshole. Just 'cause a piece of shit dries up and stops smelling, doesn't mean it's not still a piece of shit."

PAHAHAH! Yeah, and that about sums up the sperm-donor situation of my life (regarding my own father, not my baby daddy).  Just saw that comment on a social networking site and couldn't resist adding this little tidbit here. 

OMG WTF BBQ: MIL edition

Over the years, the MIL has been flaky at times.  Calling at the last minute to change or cancel plans, sometimes even waiting until the day we expect them to arrive for an overnight visit to cancel. They live 3 hours away and more often make day trips now. When we first moved in together, they would bring the whole fam damily [sic] for the weekend. I even hosted a proper family thanksgiving one year. 

Now, add to this that we now have a son. A cute, adorable, loving, smart, and very energetic 19 month old. I can count on one hand the number of times they've seen him. And, no, they haven't stayed overnight (that I can recall) since he was born and, yes, we do have a guest room and an aerobed thingy.

So, a few weeks ago, the plan was that they were coming to visit sometime this week while MIL is on vacation. Then, she asked the hubby to keep him for part of her vacation, with her, in another state, 3 hours away. She said she'd come get him, drive him back, etc.  

I asked about a car seat, as they don't have one. She and hubby agreed they'd just use one of ours. I'm not happy about this. I feel it assumes too much (that ours will work just fine in her car, that it won't need special pieces to make it work) and would much rather her just have it, be familiar with it, and be ready to use it. My own mother has one for her car, just so she can take the little man off whenever she wants. It has worked out very well, for the most part.

Anyway, this is the one huge gripe I've had, alone with lots of other small, medium, and large ones.  Like, baby gates for stairs, cabinet locks, outlet plug covers, and any other needed baby proofing (which hasn't been done... we walked my mom's house and told her what to fix, and she did, but we haven't had that opportunity with the MIL).  Gates - oh, well, she was just gonna borrow some of ours. NO! Hubby agreed and said our needed to stay cause we're using them, and she might need them for future visits (meh).

So, as of last night, she got one gate for the stairs (and might get another if it worked out), she bought fruit, and she (along with her mom and her niece), would be coming down to get the kiddo tomorrow (Friday) around 11am.  I ask hubby how everything is gonna fit in the car and do we need to pack toys too (dunno and yes). Great, more crap to pack and keep track of.

OK - playyard, high chair, food, clothes, bedding, TOYS, meds, diapers and changing stuff, sleep machine and music box, binkies, bath stuff, bath toys, books, travel cooler for car drinks and snacks (and the car seat)

Today - yes, today - she calls and said that she isn't sure about the 6 hour round trip drive or how she's gonna get everything in her car, and isn't coming.  What was I doing when she called the hubby to announce this decision -- I was at Target buying him some new outfits for MIL's, a travel cooler for the car, a duffle bag for his crap, and snacks for him to eat while traveling and there.  None of which I would have bought had she told us this last night.   Hubby called back to tell her about my mornings errands and how frustrated we both are with her and, get this, she laughed.  Bless her little heart, but that had better been a nervous tick kind of reaction.

OMG. WTF. BBQ. MIL.

You did it again. You managed to disappoint and infuriate your son. And if the kiddo was old enough to understand what going to grandma's meant, he'd be disappointed too.  Oh - and we offered to meet them half way and that was completely ignored as a suggestion. She instead, just told hubby that she'd be here tomorrow morning.

Uhm. No. Sorry. ERRRRRRR. Wrong answer. Hubby agreed cause he said he needed to talk to FIL tonight before he made his decision.  I told hubby that if he decided no on little man traveling there, her only other option for seeing him would be to spend the weekend here. But I'm guessing that's too inconvenient for her, just like getting a car seat or making plans and sticking to them.

Or, maybe she hates/they hate the house/guest bed/etc and won't tell us -- if that's the case, good grief just say so and put me out of my misery already.

So at this time, he isn't packed and the house isn't clean. I don't know what to do and I'm so angry I can't think straight. Do I work my arse off to get him ready for a weekend away or clean and shop all over again for a weekend of folks here.

I. just. want. to. scream.

a simple wtf

Let's start this post off first by saying, no, I do not claim to be a perfect writer. I often make mistakes and believe in heavy and constant editing of almost anything I write. It is often hard for me to blog because I want to spend a day or three editing and polishing something that, after three days, has lost any wow factor and ends up being deleted. Writing isn't spontaneous for me, but that is something I'm trying to improve.

Anyway, in chatting with my mom the other day using Skype's instant messenger, one of my grammatical pet-peeves slapped me really hard.

...your/you're...   Most people just switch them around, forgetting which is a possessive and which is a contraction. But this just threw me for a loop and made me ask wtf?

her -- Friend's mom just picked up clothes.  Can't remember her name????
me -- me either!!
her -- SoandSo - Friend emailed me but I got it after asking you.
me -- heh.  thanks for letting me know.
her -- your're welcome
          it was good to see SoandSo again
me -- you probably haven't seen her since i was in high school ... i know i haven't
her -- your're right

"your're" ...  I can't say that I've seen that particular misuse of the word pair before and it I found myself staring at it on the screen, almost in awe of the sheer awfulness of the poor mangled word.

bad advice

Not long after telling my mother that we were expecting our first child, she asked about our breastfeeding vs formula plans.

her: So do you think you'll use formula or try breastfeeding?
me: We really want to try breastfeeding, but I have to admit I'm nervous.
her: It's going to hurt.
me: That's what I've heard. But only for a little while. Still not looking forward to it, though.
her: You should toughen up your nipples.
me: *boggle* Huh?
her: If you toughen up your nipples, it won't hurt as much.
me: And how would I do that?!?!
her: Rub a brush over them. Manipulate them, you know, pull on them and get them used to be tugged on.
me: Whaaaaaaat? ..... 

*blank stare* 
me: Mom, did you breastfeed me?
her: No, it wasn't popular then, why?

 Such bad advice. I mentioned this during a checkup and my midwife said not to take any more advice from my mother without running it by her first. I did the only thing I could, laughed and agreed to her terms.

setting the mood

Found these quotes online after searching for a reference a friend made in passing and thought they might be good for setting the tone of this blog.

"There is no way that writers can be tamed and rendered civilized or even cured. The only solution known to science is to provide the patient with an isolation room, where he can endure the acute stages in private and where food can be poked in to him with a stick."

"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards."

Robert A. Heinlein 

Well, this isn't exactly private... *chirping crickets* ...someone might, after all, stumble upon this some day, but I still like the quote. ;-)

omg wtf bbq

funny enough, this is a phrase i see pretty often when chatting online. usually it goes like this:

thing one: omg?!?! wtf?!?!
thing two: sorry, too few abbreviations
thing one: omg wtf bbq
thing two: good enough

and, also funny enough, it makes me think of my mom.

often drama surrounds us and more times than not when we see each other we eat bbq.

so, yeah, that's what this blog's about.

all the omg wtf bbq moments of my life.