Monday, July 18, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
OMG WTF BBQ: MIL edition
Over the years, the MIL has been flaky at times. Calling at the last minute to change or cancel plans, sometimes even waiting until the day we expect them to arrive for an overnight visit to cancel. They live 3 hours away and more often make day trips now. When we first moved in together, they would bring the whole fam damily [sic] for the weekend. I even hosted a proper family thanksgiving one year.
Now, add to this that we now have a son. A cute, adorable, loving, smart, and very energetic 19 month old. I can count on one hand the number of times they've seen him. And, no, they haven't stayed overnight (that I can recall) since he was born and, yes, we do have a guest room and an aerobed thingy.
So, a few weeks ago, the plan was that they were coming to visit sometime this week while MIL is on vacation. Then, she asked the hubby to keep him for part of her vacation, with her, in another state, 3 hours away. She said she'd come get him, drive him back, etc.
I asked about a car seat, as they don't have one. She and hubby agreed they'd just use one of ours. I'm not happy about this. I feel it assumes too much (that ours will work just fine in her car, that it won't need special pieces to make it work) and would much rather her just have it, be familiar with it, and be ready to use it. My own mother has one for her car, just so she can take the little man off whenever she wants. It has worked out very well, for the most part.
Anyway, this is the one huge gripe I've had, alone with lots of other small, medium, and large ones. Like, baby gates for stairs, cabinet locks, outlet plug covers, and any other needed baby proofing (which hasn't been done... we walked my mom's house and told her what to fix, and she did, but we haven't had that opportunity with the MIL). Gates - oh, well, she was just gonna borrow some of ours. NO! Hubby agreed and said our needed to stay cause we're using them, and she might need them for future visits (meh).
So, as of last night, she got one gate for the stairs (and might get another if it worked out), she bought fruit, and she (along with her mom and her niece), would be coming down to get the kiddo tomorrow (Friday) around 11am. I ask hubby how everything is gonna fit in the car and do we need to pack toys too (dunno and yes). Great, more crap to pack and keep track of.
OK - playyard, high chair, food, clothes, bedding, TOYS, meds, diapers and changing stuff, sleep machine and music box, binkies, bath stuff, bath toys, books, travel cooler for car drinks and snacks (and the car seat)
Today - yes, today - she calls and said that she isn't sure about the 6 hour round trip drive or how she's gonna get everything in her car, and isn't coming. What was I doing when she called the hubby to announce this decision -- I was at Target buying him some new outfits for MIL's, a travel cooler for the car, a duffle bag for his crap, and snacks for him to eat while traveling and there. None of which I would have bought had she told us this last night. Hubby called back to tell her about my mornings errands and how frustrated we both are with her and, get this, she laughed. Bless her little heart, but that had better been a nervous tick kind of reaction.
OMG. WTF. BBQ. MIL.
You did it again. You managed to disappoint and infuriate your son. And if the kiddo was old enough to understand what going to grandma's meant, he'd be disappointed too. Oh - and we offered to meet them half way and that was completely ignored as a suggestion. She instead, just told hubby that she'd be here tomorrow morning.
Uhm. No. Sorry. ERRRRRRR. Wrong answer. Hubby agreed cause he said he needed to talk to FIL tonight before he made his decision. I told hubby that if he decided no on little man traveling there, her only other option for seeing him would be to spend the weekend here. But I'm guessing that's too inconvenient for her, just like getting a car seat or making plans and sticking to them.
Or, maybe she hates/they hate the house/guest bed/etc and won't tell us -- if that's the case, good grief just say so and put me out of my misery already.
So at this time, he isn't packed and the house isn't clean. I don't know what to do and I'm so angry I can't think straight. Do I work my arse off to get him ready for a weekend away or clean and shop all over again for a weekend of folks here.
I. just. want. to. scream.
Now, add to this that we now have a son. A cute, adorable, loving, smart, and very energetic 19 month old. I can count on one hand the number of times they've seen him. And, no, they haven't stayed overnight (that I can recall) since he was born and, yes, we do have a guest room and an aerobed thingy.
So, a few weeks ago, the plan was that they were coming to visit sometime this week while MIL is on vacation. Then, she asked the hubby to keep him for part of her vacation, with her, in another state, 3 hours away. She said she'd come get him, drive him back, etc.
I asked about a car seat, as they don't have one. She and hubby agreed they'd just use one of ours. I'm not happy about this. I feel it assumes too much (that ours will work just fine in her car, that it won't need special pieces to make it work) and would much rather her just have it, be familiar with it, and be ready to use it. My own mother has one for her car, just so she can take the little man off whenever she wants. It has worked out very well, for the most part.
Anyway, this is the one huge gripe I've had, alone with lots of other small, medium, and large ones. Like, baby gates for stairs, cabinet locks, outlet plug covers, and any other needed baby proofing (which hasn't been done... we walked my mom's house and told her what to fix, and she did, but we haven't had that opportunity with the MIL). Gates - oh, well, she was just gonna borrow some of ours. NO! Hubby agreed and said our needed to stay cause we're using them, and she might need them for future visits (meh).
So, as of last night, she got one gate for the stairs (and might get another if it worked out), she bought fruit, and she (along with her mom and her niece), would be coming down to get the kiddo tomorrow (Friday) around 11am. I ask hubby how everything is gonna fit in the car and do we need to pack toys too (dunno and yes). Great, more crap to pack and keep track of.
OK - playyard, high chair, food, clothes, bedding, TOYS, meds, diapers and changing stuff, sleep machine and music box, binkies, bath stuff, bath toys, books, travel cooler for car drinks and snacks (and the car seat)
Today - yes, today - she calls and said that she isn't sure about the 6 hour round trip drive or how she's gonna get everything in her car, and isn't coming. What was I doing when she called the hubby to announce this decision -- I was at Target buying him some new outfits for MIL's, a travel cooler for the car, a duffle bag for his crap, and snacks for him to eat while traveling and there. None of which I would have bought had she told us this last night. Hubby called back to tell her about my mornings errands and how frustrated we both are with her and, get this, she laughed. Bless her little heart, but that had better been a nervous tick kind of reaction.
OMG. WTF. BBQ. MIL.
You did it again. You managed to disappoint and infuriate your son. And if the kiddo was old enough to understand what going to grandma's meant, he'd be disappointed too. Oh - and we offered to meet them half way and that was completely ignored as a suggestion. She instead, just told hubby that she'd be here tomorrow morning.
Uhm. No. Sorry. ERRRRRRR. Wrong answer. Hubby agreed cause he said he needed to talk to FIL tonight before he made his decision. I told hubby that if he decided no on little man traveling there, her only other option for seeing him would be to spend the weekend here. But I'm guessing that's too inconvenient for her, just like getting a car seat or making plans and sticking to them.
Or, maybe she hates/they hate the house/guest bed/etc and won't tell us -- if that's the case, good grief just say so and put me out of my misery already.
So at this time, he isn't packed and the house isn't clean. I don't know what to do and I'm so angry I can't think straight. Do I work my arse off to get him ready for a weekend away or clean and shop all over again for a weekend of folks here.
I. just. want. to. scream.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)